Kim's Thoughts
Just a few thoughts I feel worthy of jotting down!
Remembering My Poppie….
To explain why this man was so very special to me, I have to back up and start with a little history. My “father” – the one who supplied part of my DNA – left us when I was a very young little girl and hasn’t been around since just a little after that time. To say that I wouldn’t recognize him if I passed him on the street is probably stretching it a little, but the truth isn’t far from that! Now – in contrast to that, my “Dad” – the one who meant the world to me and was my Dad in every sense of the word that matters – was this man – Charlie Culmo! We affectionately nicknamed him “Poppie”. Charlie passed away on this day (March 20th) in 1999. I can’t believe he has been gone for 9 years now! I still miss him terribly. After all this time, I still forget I can’t just call him and he’ll be there!
Charlie officially came into our lives when I was in high school. He was my friend and my hero – he was my Poppie!!! He was a family friend long before he started dating my Mom, so when they decided to get together, it seemed like the most natural thing in the world – it all just clicked!!!
Some of the great memories I have of him:
~~ “Our” song was Teddy Bear Song by Barbara Fairchild. It was a great country song to slow dance to and whenever we would hear it, we would dance. Regardless of who we were with or what was going on, we wouldn’t dance to this song with anyone else – it was OUR’s! It had a sort of “two step” beat to it, so it was a nice song to dance to and Charlie was a really good dancer. From then on, teddy bears tended to be a symbol of what we meant to each other – I even put a teddy bear figurine in his casket that said “you will always be close at heart”! (if you’d like to hear it and read the lyrics, click on the song title to link to a page that will take you there)
~~ He was 100% pure Italian and a really great cook — he would make us pasta to die for!!! He would make the best lasagna and, knowing that I am allergic to cheese, he would make a special pan just for me without cheese! And it was so good – even without the one thing that makes it real lasagna – because it was made with love!
~~ He didn’t really speak Italian, but his parents did and he knew some Italian. He would throw Italian sounding words around to crack us up – we never knew if some of them were real or made up (most were supposedly cuss words), but they always made us laugh. When he first made pasta for us, he was in our kitchen and asked us for a “skoolabasta” (I am absolutely positive I didn’t spell that right, but that’s how it sounded – ha-ha)!! My brother and I looked at each other with weird expressions and had no idea what he wanted!!! He said “skoolabasta, skoolabasta – you know, macaroni stay, water go away!” in a put on Italian accent! That puzzled us even more! Mom finally went to the cupboard and got the COLANDER so he could strain the pasta!!! ha-ha That became a standing joke with us for many, many years!!!! I still call a colander a “skoolabasta – macaroni stay, water go away”!!!! At the funeral, my brother and I told the minister that story to add to the others he had to tell during the eulogy — he was reading his notes and tried to pronounce the word and totally messed it up — all of Charlie’s brothers chimed in with a chorus of “skoolabasta” to let the room know what the minister was talking about and then we all recited along with the minister when he said the part about “macaroni stay, water go away”!!! Every one laughed and smiled — Charlie would have LOVED that — I bet he was watching and cracking up at us all!!!!
~~ He never, ever treated us like or referred to us as “step children” — and we never, ever thought of him as a “step father” — we were his kids and he was our Dad!!! PERIOD!!!!
~~ He was there for every major event from high school on — graduation, 18th birthday, parties, giving his opinion on my boyfriends, etc………………and – he gave me away at my wedding!!! He told me that it was the one most precious time for him! He was so proud to perform that duty for me and it was very, very special………..but, truth be told, it was much more so for me!!! Girls dream of their weddings from the time they are very small – I was no exception. But, when I dreamed of my wedding, my dreams didn’t have a “Father of the Bride”! I always planned to have my brother give me away – which was perfectly fine and the plan for many years! But, when the time came for me to plan the wedding for “real”, Charlie was there and I did end up having a “Father of the Bride” after all!!!! I called my brother and told him that I had always planned to have him do the honors, but hoped that my asking Charlie to do it wouldn’t hurt his feelings — he loved Charlie very much, too, and responded with “yeah – who else would you ask!!!” So, it was done! And I adore the photos of us walking down the aisle together and the memories I have of my Poppie and his little girl all dressed up………….So, he thought I was honoring him — but, actually, he was honoring me!!! I’ll always cherish that!!!
~~ He built computers in his spare time. He kept me in computer upgrades for years!!! We often joked about how when he retired, we could go into business together — he would be the hardware geek and I would be the software geek and together we could solve every one’s computer problems!!!
~~ The one thing that I was excited about him sharing with me was when I had my LASIK surgery! Mom sent me the money to have it done and I did it in February 1999. He was so happy for me — every time we talked, he would ask me “how does everything look to ya?” or something similar!!! I had a trip planned to visit with them in April and he told me all the time how he couldn’t wait to see me with no glasses and no squinting!!! But – he died in March!
There was so much more — years and years of fabulous memories and zillions of little things he did with and for me!!! I could go on forever…………but, won’t! The one thing I am most happy and proud of is that I don’t have a regret in the world when it comes to him — I will never have to say that there was something important left unsaid! I know without a shadow of a doubt that he knew exactly what he meant to me and I knew exactly what I meant to him!!! I will never have to say that I wish I hadn’t let so much time go by without speaking to him – I actually talked to him on the phone the morning he died – I called him to ask him some computer question and he said he was feeling kinda tired. Later that day, he died of a massive heart attack at age 59! He would have been 60 in May.
So – now he is one of my three guardian angels – Poppie, Grandma, and Grandpa! The three of them watch over me and let me know they are here with me by warming my heart whenever I think of them or something happens that makes me think of them. And they visit me in my dreams and I get to have a chat with them and hug them!
I was sad most of the day today — thinking of him every time I had to write the date and other things triggered memories! Oh, how I hope he will visit me in my dreams tonight — I sure could use a hug from him to help warm up my heart!!!!
That’s my Poppie — I miss him, I love him, he will always be close at heart!!!!
Happy Spring!
And what a lovely first day of Spring is was……..
Dancing, Medium, Visitors
I also managed to stay awake long enough to watch Medium tonight, too — I slept through the first new show since the writer’s strike last week……it was good tonight!
I’ve logged in 533 unique visitors on my blog – but the big milestone is that I have reached 1000 page loads!!! And I’ve only been keeping track since around Thanksgiving or so…….thanks to all who are regular visitors and to those who just pop in based on a search or link from a fellow blogger!
Megan – What A Mess!!!
It all happened so fast — within a split second!! I stood there for a minute in disbelief – then, I had to get a towel and clean up the mess — and what a mess it was!!!! After I got the floor all mopped up, I let the girls back in for their dinner — they were much calmer this time around and Megan politely walked over to the food dishes and ate her dinner without further incident…..WHEW!!!!
Just Dreaming….
I dreamed I took in a room mate. She was a lady in her 40s that needed a place to stay until she could come up with a down payment on a home of her own. On her first day after she moved in, I told her all the “rules” and made it a point to tell her what I expect when it comes to the girls. I told her that I don’t feed them table scraps and that their meals and snacks should be left for me to take care of so that I can be sure they don’t get too many snacks. She agreed.
I went into the kitchen one day and found Megan eating a whole scone rapped in bacon and a paper plate with some scrambled eggs on it. I yelled to my new room mate and asked her if she gave that to her and she said yes, but that she told her to share it with her sisters and it wasn’t all meant for just her. I reminded her that I told her NO table scraps. She said it wasn’t “scraps”, that she made it special for them. She then said that if Megan didn’t listen to the instructions to “share”, then it was MY fault for not training them better!!! I slapped her on the side of her head and said “they are dogs – you can’t expect them to listen like children!” and again reminded her to NOT give them ANYTHING!!! She said OK….
Later that day, I found her giving them all Milkbone biscuits – they each had 5 or 6 in front of them gobbling as fast as they could!!!! I yelled at her to STOP and slapped her on the side of the head AGAIN — here, in one day, she had given Megan a scone, bacon, and eggs and all three at least 5 or 6 biscuits – PLUS the regular food I already gave them!!!! I was furious and told her that she would have to move out cause I loved my dogs and wasn’t about to watch her ruin their diet and health like that! She told me that I didn’t have a right to throw her out because of that and that I was depriving my dogs of food and she was going to report me for starving them to death!!! We ended up in a knock down drag out fist fight!!!!
The dream ended with me tossing her out the front door and telling her that I’ll send her stuff out the same way she went out! Then I woke up to the girls licking my face to get up for breakfast and potty time!!! ha-ha-ha
Mark Twain at the Temple Theater
I went to the 2:00 show today and all I can say is BRAVO!!!! It was delightful – simply delightful….. Mr. Chappell had the entire audience laughing out loud and totally engaged! We hung on his every word and enjoyed every minute of it! My only regret is that I didn’t have an opportunity to see it more than once – I understand it differs a little each time he does it by not always telling the same stories every time! I would have liked to see what stories I missed at at least one of the other showings while he was in town!
I’m sorry this review won’t put a bug under some one’s butt to go see it — the final show was today! But, I am so glad I had the chance to see it!!! It was very special…….
Sunday Morning Ponderings….
What a small world it is….. Yesterday, while I was browsing for a book in the Borders store in the terminal in the Baltimore-Washington International Airport, I heard someone say, “Kim, is that you?”. I thought surely they were talking to someone else, but I turned around anyway and saw a familiar face!!! It was Sarah Cedano from here in Sanford!!! We went through the LEEdership Sanford program together. How bazaar to run into someone from Sanford in Baltimore!!! We talked a little and discovered we were on the same Southwest flight to Sanford. Since she works for US Representative Etheridge, I thought maybe she had been in DC on business or something. But, as it turned out, she had been in Massachusetts because her mother had passed away. We went on about our business of looking for and purchasing a book. When I got down to the gate, I looked for her, but didn’t see her. I figured that since the flight was full, we may not see each other again. I was wrong! I boarded the plane in the “A” group and got a window seat. Many others came on and passed by me for other seat choices. Then, along came Sarah and I was pleased that she decided to sit with me. We talked some more and compared the books that we purchased. It was nice to see her and have a friendly, familiar face to spend some time with in my travels back home!
Sunday Morning….. I like to watch the news show Sunday Morning. They have such interesting segments – not like a lot of other news shows. This morning, they had a segment on James Earl Jones – what a wonderful actor he is!!! I always enjoy his soothing, deep voice and the genuineness he brings to any character he portrays. What a joy it is to know that there are still some great actors out there bringing such depth and meaning to their craft!
You know what I like??? I like those Smuckers Uncrustables sandwiches — they are little frozen soft bread “pies” with peanutbutter and strawberry jam, grape jelly, or honey inside! They are so good!!! I like to eat them while they are still frozen — but they are good thawed, too! Yummy — I just had a couple of the strawberry ones for breakfast — oh, they’re so good!!!
Well, guess I’ll go through the stack of mail I have waiting for me! Have a wonderful Sunday – I know I will……
What I’m Reading….
I also used to love going to book stores – big box book stores and little quaint book stores! I could spend hours and hours in a Barnes and Nobles – browsing the books, sitting in their comfy chairs reading the first chapter or two of a proposed book to see if it grabs my attention, and looking for gifts for friends and family! But – with no book store in Sanford and the lengthy drive to Cary or Fayetteville to get to one and the lack of time and attention span to devote to reading for pleasure, I don’t do that much anymore.
But – I am still drawn to book stores and books when I come across them. So, while on my layover in Baltimore yesterday on my return trip from Mom’s, I had a lot of time to kill. I had a great lunch at a seafood restaurant in the terminal (can’t go to MD without having some crab!) and wandered through the Border’s book store. I spent quite a while there looking for a book that would catch my attention and look like it just might give me something to read for pleasure again!
I found the book The Gathering, by Anne Enright. Anne Enright is an Irish author who has several awards for her writing. This book, in particular, was the winner of the Man Booker Prize of 2007. I sat at the gate and began reading it and, so far, it is wonderful…….I made it through the first 5 chapters and am totally intrigued!!! I think I found it — the book that will hold my attention and provide me with a pleasurable read!!!
The Gathering is a story told in the narrative by a character named Veronica Hegarty – one of 12 children of a very large Irish family, all of whom are now adults and are gathering together for the funeral of one of the brothers – Liam. I have already discovered that Liam had some emotional issues and committed suicide by walking out into the sea and drowned himself. I have also already discovered that emotional issues are likely something that runs rampant in this family – although I haven’t discovered why, yet (the synopsis on the book jacket implies long kept family secrets and betrayals as the culprit).
I am generally drawn to anything with Irish tones – I have some Irish blood in me and am fascinated by the culture. Another thing that struck me very early in the book – the main character, Veronica, had a grandmother named Ada — I also had a grandmother named Ada!!! She talks about how beautiful her granny Ada was – my grandma Ada was also a very beautiful young woman!!! Go figure!!!
Here is what the book jacket has to say:
“A dazzling writer of international stature, Anne Enright is one of Ireland’s most singular voices. Now she delivers The Gathering, a moving, evocative portrait of a large Irish family haunted by the past. The nine surviving children of the Hegarty clan are gathering in Dublin for the wake of their wayward brother, Liam, who drowned in the sea. His sister, Veronica, collects the body and keeps the dead man company, guarding the secret she shares with him – something that happened in their grandmother’s house in the winter of 1968. As Enright traces the line of betrayal and redemption through three generations, she shows how memories warp and secrets fester. As in all Enright’s work, her distinctive intelligence twists the world a fraction, and gives it back to us in a new and unforgettable light.”
If this does truly end up being a success for me, I think I just may look up some of the other works of Ms. Enright!!!
My Home Town
Long shot of Main Street – I wish I had taken a better shot of the building on the right – it is the Presbyterian Church and is an incredible building!!!
Main Street a little closer up – the block leading up to the Canal bridge….
Look at these historic buildings — aren’t they incredible??????
The canal bridge from a distance….
The canal bridge up close — I read a blog from a photographer from Connecticut who took a photo of our lift bridge and called it the “stairway to nowhere”! ha-ha What he didn’t know was that the bridge lifts up to allow boats to go under it. While it is up, pedestrians can walk up the stairway and across the bridge and then down the stairway on the other side of the bridge. When we were kids, we used to run when we heard the bridge warning bells signifying that it was being lifted — we would run up the stairs and stand on the bridge watching the boats go by – then ride the bridge down. It was so much fun!!! Little did we know when we were kids that the canal was a major historical landmark and links the ocean to the Great Lakes!!! It was a major transportation corridor to get goods through NY State – connecting NY City to the mid-west states! They drain it during the winter months and then flood it to fill it again during the summer months. It’s an amazing thing and an interesting piece of history. It was mostly hand dug by Irish immigrants – many of which died in the effort!
So – that is my home town!!!
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